R33S2

Yeah Mel ManUP!! Lol

Targa west Aus in on 9 ATM

getting into the JB black gotta start work at 4am, I'm sorta in your boat ATM, just workin saturdays.

I keep seeing a 34 4dr around the Hyperdome, Wifey drives and the kids look rapt as.

This show is a real crack up, women practicing on dildos lol!!!!

and are you?

woo hoo

2 yrs ago mine cost me $800 in Hong Kong, it cost $3-400 to import. My bonnet had a acid rain look to it and a good respray was quoted at $750, this way I get a spare bonnet and no respray hassles, straight up bolt on all I had to do was switch the water spray nozzles.

One day while on patrol, a police officer pulled over a car for speeding. He went up to the car and asked the driver to roll down her window. The first thing he noticed, besides the nice red sports car, was how gorgeous the driver was! Drop dead blonde, the works. "I've pulled you over for speeding, Ma'am.... Could I see your driver's license...?" "...License...???" replied the blonde, instantly revealing that she wasn't very bright. "It's usually in your wallet..." replied the officer. After fumbling for a few minutes, the driver managed to find it. "Now may I see your registration..." asked the cop. "Registration..... what's that....?" asked the blonde. "It's usually in your glove compartment..." said the cop impatiently. After more fumbling, she found the registration. "I'll be back in a minute," said the cop and walked back to his car. The officer radioed the dispatch to run a check on the woman's license and registration. After a few moments, the dispatcher came back. "Ummm.... is this woman driving a red sports car?" "Yes," replied the officer. "Is she a drop dead gorgeous blonde?" asked the dispatcher. "Uh... yes" replied the cop. "Here's what you do...." said the dispatcher. "Give her the stuff, stand back, and drop your pants..." "WHAT!!? I can't do that. That's crazy!" exclaimed the cop. "Trust me..... just do it...." said the dispatcher. So the cop returned to the blonde, gave back the license and registration, and dropped his pants as the dispatcher said. The blonde looked down and sighed, "Ohh no... not ANOTHER breathalyzer....

There are three blondes stranded on an island. Suddenly a fairy appears and offers to grant each one of them one wish. The first blonde asks to be intelligent. Instantly, she is turned into a brown haired woman and she swims off the island. The next one asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one, so instantly she is turned into a black haired woman. The black haired woman builds a boat and sails off the island. The third blonde asks to become even more intelligent than the previous two. The fairy turns her into a man, and he walks across the bridge.

A girl says to her doctor, "You have to help me. I hurt all over." She touches her right knee with her index finger and says, "Ow! That hurts." She touches her left cheek with her index finger and says, "Ouch! That hurts, too." She touches her right earlobe with her index finger and says, "Ow! Even that hurts." The doctor says, "Are you a natural blonde?" She says, "Yes." The doctor says, "You have a sprained finger."

Yesterday Scientists in The USA revealed that beer contains small traces of female genes. To prove their theory they fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started talking rubbish and couldn't drive.

Two young guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court on Friday before the judge. The judge said, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and get them to give up drugs forever. I'll see you back in court Monday." Monday, the two guys were in court, and the judge said to the 1st one, "How did you do over the weekend?" "Well, your honor, I persuaded 17 people to give up drugs forever." "17 people? That's wonderful. What did you tell them?" "I used a diagram, your honor. I drew two circles like this... O o and told them this (the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this (small circle) is your brain after drugs." "That's admirable," said the judge. "And you, how did you do?"(to the 2nd boy) "Well, your honor, I persuaded 156 people to give up drugs forever." "156 people! That's amazing! How did you manage to do that!" "Well, I used a similar approach. (draws two circles) O o I said (pointing to the small circle) this is your arsehole before prison ..."

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the ceiling of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it. He told them to piss off and let him get some sleep, but they persisted until he finally gave in. "OK, follow me," he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him. Down through a valley they went, across a river and into a forest of trees. Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him. "Now, do you see that tree over there?" he asked. "YES, YES, YES!!" the bats all screamed in a frenzy. "Good!" said the first bat, "Because I f**king didn't!"

MEH! IANSRB IANS32

Pod is secure, I have a handset for the microtech and he knew what it was, to be clear on this it wasnt a defect, it says on the fine "drive vehicle if equipment does not comply with the vehicle standards" (word for word there) offense details "pod airfilter, aftermarket computer" I'm not too concerned but the gist of it was, I didnt have a mod plate for anything and he wants me to get one to comply with the law, he could of defected the car but let me off with this as a warning. I have a feeling he just wanted to look at the car and then started telling me about his RX3 with a microtech and all the shit he went through with it even tho he is a cop lol. The reason he pulled me over was, I was be tailed by this total f**kwit who was tailgaiting me for ages and when I got to an intersection, I blasted through it to leave him behind, he was somewhere close and heard the roar and blow off.

Just out of interest I got pulled over today and fined for not having a mod plate for the pod and micrrotech ecu $75 no points BUT he made no mention at all about my carbon over fibreglass bonnet but then again I didnt ask either lol

Hey whores

In a long line of people, one guy suddenly starts massaging the back of the person in front of him, the person turned and asked, what the hell you are doing? "Well," said the guy massaging the back, "you see I'm a chiropractor and I can't help massaging your back. I can't help practicing my art." "Are you crazy?" the other guy said, "Look, I'm a lawyer. Am I f**king the guy in front of me?"

Four Irishmen are sitting in a pub. One asks the others if they know what is the fastest thing in the world. The first replies: "It is blinking. Have you ever seen yourself blink? No. That's because it's so fast." The second disagrees: It is thinking. Before you know it there's a thought in your head it's so fast" The third disagrees: "It is electricity. No sooner have you turned the switch and the light goes on." The fourth (who asked the question) tells them: "You are all wrong. The fastest thing in the world is diarrhea. The other night before I could blink, think or turn the light on I'd filled my pants!"

Hey Mike it looks like you are getting your jokes from the same place as me, THREE KINDS OF SEX 1. House Sex: when you are newly-married, you have sex all over the house, in every room 2. Bedroom Sex: after you've been married a while, you just have sex in the bedroom 3. Hall Sex: after you've been married for many, many, many years, you just pass each other in the hallway and say "f**k you"

OH! yes morning :waves sluggishly:

And for those doing that horrid work thing. I thought I saw the light at the end of the tunnel... ,but it was just some bastard with a torch bringing me more work!

What a start to the day, I have a guy on the roof vacuuming the gutters, woke me up he did and what noise !!!!! I wish I was a glow-worm A glow-worm’s never glum How can you be unhappy When the sun shines out your bum!

10.4 I like it, gee he blew some fuel on gear changes. Bryn your sig is funny, but then again I have sigs turned off so I dont see it.