Agree on CR with jim.
I can't believe you can't find a manual ECU cheaper than that. How many people on this website have upgraded to a PFC. They would sell you there old ECU for $100 no worries I reckon. Put up a wanted to buy thread.
That said, the stock ECU wont be able to handle what that turbo will put through it so it will need to be chipped or you need a PFC anyway. Whether you go R33 or R34 you still need a pfc or equivalent.
The NEO head should definitely be a little better than the R33 but you are hamstringing yourself with that old turbo.
It doesn't get the extra power from extra boost. Both are 7psi. It gets it from different head (solid lifters, different cams etc) better ECU and a larger exhaust housing on the turbo.
As for the loom, you either have to make one up or bite the bullet and buy one. Whoever buys your engine should you choose to sell it will probably talk you down based on the fact that you have no loom if they are doing a conversion. I looked at buying a second hand motor when I blew mine recently but the cost v cost of a rebuild makes it not worth while and this is the only situation where a buyer wouldn't need the loom.