Frunknmont

Finished with 100% completion as a reward I got a rhino(tank) and hunter(harrier) at CJ,s house in Los santos. Damn it I was hoping for helicopter as a reward

:wassup:

Best chrissy barbie I been to this year. Was a good turn out, good food good people. But did I ever get sunburnt I was glowing in the dark last night

When four of Santa's elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress. Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked, and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hidden the liquor, and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider pot, and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw end of the broom. Just then the doorbell rang, and irritable Santa trudged to the door. He opened the door, and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't it a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?" And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas

Im heading up to the Brissy area over new years for a bit of fun in in the sun and Im just wondering where all the good party spots for nye are

Found an interesting little loophole in the game. From what ive read to get the apache helicopter you need to get all gold at flight school first. But I came across a way to get one without doing that. Go to the Las Venturas airport and go to the checkpoint raceing start area, Start the heli hell checkpoint race-the one where you fly the helicopter but instead of going through the checkpoints fly up to the desert airport and park it in the hanger/garage then after you get the failed mission screen just quit out of the raceing drive back to your airport and there waiting for you is the apache helicopter The only downside to it is once you blow it up its gone and you have to do it all again to get one. It does make the vigalante mission so easy though

Ive had that same problem with the San ferrero garage and cars disapearing so I just dont use that garage anymore. Another option to get a patriot is at the Naval base in San ferrero theres one at the end of the peir past the warship and then its only a short drive to the drop off point or to a a pay and spray.

Found anothing thing with the girlfriends, its not just flowers you can give to them but the purple dildos you get from the police station as well

Gone through it twice now. After finishing it the first time memory card stuffed up and I lost all the saves. So just finished redoing it. Havent finished everything yet, done all the g/f's. I recomend getting the cop and the nurse girlfriends because when you do it gives you free hospital and busted visits and you dont lose your weapons anymore either. Just need one more car for the import mission be damned if I can find it but.

Ive had that happen too Adzmax what I found helps is to just bum around do some of the racing missions or something then go back in a couple of days and she should be back

In the wake of recent events the scapegoating has begun http://dailytelegraph.news.com.au/story

As the title says I need a new set of shocks for an R33. Not able to afford replacing the whole suspension just yet, just need to get a couple of adequate shockers for the front and was just wanting to know the best place to go and see about getting some, nothing to full on just something to get me by till I can upgrade the whole lot. Any help on where to get a set for a reasonable price would be appreciated, also don't need to worry about installation between me and a mate we can do that part

Also I forgot to add that you can have more than one girl at a time just means more work keeping them all happy

Different girls like different stuff but always roll up in a good car undamaged, and try not to crash while driving. With denise take her to the bar just around the corner, unless she specifically wants to go dancing or just drive, that always worked for me. And to get the girl at the driving school interested you have to chubb up have to be at at least 75% fat before she will go out with you. When she does but it unlocks a free body shop in San Ferrero. One other thing that can help is find a bunch of flowers that are everywhere then after the date select them then it should say up in the corner L1 to give flowers this helps a little too.

On the topic of dating the girls if you get a 100% rating with a girl you get a message saying check your wardrobe because she has just bought you a present. The first girl Denise buys you a pimp suit. And there is 5 girls all up to date. 2 of them are part of missions the other 3 you have to find for yourself. There is one in the driving school at San ferrero. And that wheel arch angels workshop is cool. Once its unlocked you can mod the elegy(skyline) and sultan(wrx) with exhausts bodykits rear wings and paint jobs Rice them right up:D

Havent seen single led's but what I have seen and cant believe is around are bolt on exhaust tips with half a dozen led's in them. And what cars have I seen them on none other than everybodys fave POS the comowhore And another thing I hate which hasnt been mentioned yet is led valve caps A guy I know has them on his XR8 they light up when the wheels turn

Hey Funky I be the artist formerly know as montyGTST

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just take the rotten apples from the grounds that aren't as good, but easy....... The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree. Share this with other women who are good apples, even those who have already been picked! Now Men.... Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

Mental Hospital answering machine Hello and welcome to Tower County Mental Health Hospital:" If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5,and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer. If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696. If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound key until a representative comes on the line. If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, s-l-o-w-l-y and c-a-r-f-u-l-l-y press 0-0-0 If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. Our operators are too busy to talk with you. If you are menopausal, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever. If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.

A woman went into a store to buy her husband a pet for his birthday. After looking around, she found that all the pets were very expensive. She told the clerk she wanted to buy a pet, but she didn't want to spend a fortune. "Well," said the clerk, "I have a very large bullfrog. They say it's been trained to give blowjobs !" "Blowjobs!", the woman replied. "It hasn't been proven, but we've sold 30 of them this month," he said. The woman thought it would be a great gag gift, and what if it's true...no more blowjobs for her ! She bought the frog. When she explained froggy's ability to her husband, he was extremely skeptical and laughed it off. The woman went to bed happy, thinking she may never need to perform this less than riveting act again. In the middle of the night, she was awakened by the noise of pots and pans flying everywhere, making hellacious banging and crashing sounds. She ran downstairs to the kitchen, only to find her husband and the frog reading cookbooks. "What are you two doing at this hour?" she asked. The husband replied," If I can teach this frog to cook, your ass is gone."

Real women -vs- Ladies Ladies - Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces. Real Women - Leftover wine?? Hello!! Ladies - Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away. Real Women - Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who the hell cares! Ladies - Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips. Real Women - Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake. You are probably lying on your ass on the couch, with your feet up anyway. Ladies - To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes. Real Women - Buy boxed mashed potato mix and you don't have to worry about the potatoes growing arms and legs. Ladies - When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white powdery mess on the bottom of the cake. Real Women - Go to the bakery - they'll even decorate the son of a b*tch for you. Ladies - Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish. Real Women - Sara Lee frozen freakin pie directions do not include brushing egg whites, so don't do it. Ladies - If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy. Real Women - Go ask the very HOT neighbour guy to do it.

The Pope dies and, naturally, goes to heaven. The reception committee meets him, and after a whirlwind tour is told that he can enjoy any of the myriad recreations available. He decides that he wants to read all of the ancient original text of the Holy Scriptures, and spends the next eon or so learning the languages. After becoming a linguistic master, he sits down in the library and begins to pore over every version of the Bible, working back from the most recent "Easy Reading" to the original script. All of a sudden there is a screaming the library. The angels come running to him, only to find the Pope huddled in a chair, crying to himself, and muttering, "An 'R'! They left out the 'R'." God takes him aside, offering comfort and asks him what the problem is. After collecting his wits, the Pope sobs again,” It’s the letter 'R' ... the word was supposed to be CELEBRATE!"

If you think life is bad. How would you like to be an egg? * You only get laid once. * You only get eaten once. * It takes 4 minutes to get hard. Only 2 minutes to get soft. * You share your box with 11 other guys. * But worst of all.... The only chick that ever sat on your face was your mother. So cheer up...Your life ain't that bad!!!

Things you would like to say at work How do I set a laser printer to stun? And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...? Do I look like a people person? This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer. If I throw a stick, will you leave? You!... Off my planet! Does your train of thought have a caboose? Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe? Errors have been made. Others will be blamed. A PBS mind in an MTV world. Allow me to introduce my selves. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup. See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil. Are those your eyeballs? I found them in my cleavage. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door. Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1? Too many freaks, not enough circuses. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it? Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.

THINGS YOU'D LOVE TO SAY OUT LOUD AT WORK.... 1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit. 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for you? 4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. 5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way. 6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter. 7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message. 8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant. 9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a damn word you're saying. 10. Ahhh... I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again. 11. I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid. 12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. 13. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a damn. 14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth. 15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you. 16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. 17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist. 18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental. 19. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off. 20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant. 21. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...? 22. Do I look like a people person? 23. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer. 24. If I throw a stick, will you leave?