Jump to content
SAU Community

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 1.7k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

Posted Images

Johnny(Manager) wanted to screw a girl(Employee) in his office.....but she belonged to someone else...

One day Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said

"I'll give you a 1000 dollars if you let me screw you...." but the girl

said "NO".

Johnny said "I'll be fast, I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down, I'll be finished by the time you pick it up." She thought for a moment and said that she would have to consult her boyfriend.....so she called her boyfriend and told him the story.

Her boyfriend says "ask him for 2000 dollars, pick up the money very fast, he won't even be able to get his pants down."

So she agrees and accepts the proposal. Half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is waiting for his girlfriend to call. Finally after 45 mins the boyfriend calls and asks "what happened......"

She said "THE BASTARD USED COINS!!!"

Management lesson: ALWAYS CONSIDER A BUSINESS PROPOSAL IN ITS ENTIRETY!

Irish Gas Station

>

>Taking a wee break from the golf circuit, Tiger Woods drove his new Ford

>Excursion into an Irish gas station.

>

>An attendant greeted him in typical Irish manner, unaware who the golf pro

>was.

>

>"Top of the mornin' to ya!" the Irishman smiled, doffing his cap.

>

>As Tiger got out of the mammoth vehicle, two tees fell out of his pocket.

>

>"So what are those, lad?" asked the attendant.

>

>"They're called tees," replied Tiger.

>

>"And what would ya be usin' 'em for, now?" inquired the Irishman.

>

>"Well, they're for resting my balls on when I drive," said Tiger.

>

>"AW! Jaysus, Mary an'Joseph," exclaimed the Irish attendant.

>

>"Those fellas at FORD think of everything!"

Naked Hillbilly

>

>Two Indians and a Tennessee Hillbilly were walking through the woods.

>All of a sudden one of the Indians ran up a hill to the mouth of a small

>cave. "Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!"he called into the cave and listened

>closely

>until he heard an answering, "Wooooo! Wooooo! Woooooo! He then tore off

>his

>clothes and ran into the cave.

>

>The Hillbilly was puzzled and asked the remaining Indian what it was all

>about. "Was the other Indian crazy or what?" The Indian replied

>"No, It is our custom during mating season when Indian men see cave, they

>holler 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' into the opening. ! If they get an answer

>back, it means there's a beautiful woman in there waiting for us."

>

>Just then they came upon another cave. The second Indian ran up to the

>cave,

>stopped, and hollered, "Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!" Immediately, there was

>the

>answer. "Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!"from deep inside. He also tore off his

>clothes and ran into the opening.

>

>The Hillbilly wandered around in the woods alone for a while, and then

>spied

>a third large cave. As he looked in amazement at the size of the huge

>opening, he was thinking, "Hoo, man! Look at the size of this cave! It is

>bigger than those the Indians found. There must be some really big, fine

>women in this cave!" He stood in front of the opening and hollered with

>all

>his might "Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!"

>

>Like the others, he then heard an answering call, "WOOOOOOOOO, WOOOOOOOOO

>WOOOOOOOOO!"

>With a gleam in his eye and a smile on his face, he raced into the cave,

>tearing off his clothes as he ran.

>

>The following day, the headline of the local newspaper read....

>

>(Are you ready for this??),

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

>NAKED HILLBILLY RUN OVER BY TRAIN

>

>

>

>============================================================

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now



  • Similar Content

  • Latest Posts

    • This looks great! Awesome to have the 5 speed with an LSD in this. The Recaro's look like SR2's or SR3's. It's a shame they've been retrimmed as they would have looked sweet in their original colours. I think I'd want my agent to be a little more up front and informative too. I've never imported but I reckon it would make me a little nervous, so the more info the better.
    • Thanks for doing that Duncan! Makes you a good person in my books. We don't get kangaroos or wombats here. But we have bats and it's similar. AFAIK it's often the mums with a baby attached that get hit because they drop lower when starting from a tree. If you hit an animal, check on it. https://www.ifaw.org/au/resources/wildlife-rescue-app An app to get the closest wildlife rescue contact.
    • My dream is also to have a proper hoist, but I don't think it will ever happen. My quickjack is probably as close as I'll ever get, it really is very good though. 
    • Yeah we keep on in the dailies, it is pretty poor how many animals get hit and the driver leaves without checking....have saved a couple of little ones over the years. Bit of a gruesome job though, pouches generally need to be cut open because they are so tight and often the joey doesn't realise mum is gone so they are still locked onto the teat. I checked the modules in front of the DS wheel where an oil cooler should go.... There is the radar unit - that can go for race use) One of the 2 HX water pumps, the silver cylinder. That needs to be kept but might be able to be relocated But the bad news, the big computer mounted vertically in front of the wheel (blocking any potential air exit) is the electric steering computer. That is required until/unless i do a hydraulic steering conversion, and in CAD based modern car design it is not like I can just pop a big unit like that somewhere else (plus the loom would be too short anywhere else too). So, the passenger side is OK to clear out (just use a smaller washer reservoir, potentially elsewhere), but the DS no beuno
    • Well, all the best with the new camry It was interesting to hear about the UK process, it is generally a lot more streamlined here with a shipping agent looking after all the import side (noting the exact final price can still be a surprise.....) and I've used a few different brokers on the japan (or US) side, and never had any trouble with any of them....luck of the draw I guess. You mentioned you didn't get the auction sheet (understandable since you bought it from a dealer, not auction), but I always try and get hold of that because they are pretty thorough. I've imported 2x R grade vehicles over the years and both were fine, repairs in Japan are pretty thorough compared to here in Oz.
×
×
  • Create New...