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Babylon

By Babylon,
in New South Wales

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Babylon Grand Master

Babylon

Posted
Posted

"A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs. Three women were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man. The first woman said "Have you ever had a hug?" The man said "No," so she gave him a hug and walked on. The second woman said "Have you ever had a kiss?" The man said "No," so she gave him a kiss and walked on. The third woman came to him and said "Have you ever been FU*CKED?" The fellow said "No", She said "You will be when the tide comes in"

:jump: :jump: :jump: :jump: :jump: :jump: :jump: :jump:

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Abo Bob Grand Master

Abo Bob

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Posted

A guy was in a horrible accident where pretty much everything was amputated. He was just a head on a pillow.

So it was his birthday and everyone was standing around giving him a present. It was all wrapped up and he had a bit of trouble but eventually using his teeth he got it open and he said, "Oh no. Not another ****ing hat!"

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Babylon Grand Master

Babylon

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  • Author
Posted
A guy was in a horrible accident where pretty much everything was amputated.  He was just a head on a pillow.

So it was his birthday and everyone was standing around giving him a present.  It was all wrapped up and he had a bit of trouble but eventually using his teeth he got it open and he said, "Oh no.  Not another ****ing hat!"

lol (OWNED)

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Trust33 Grand Master

Trust33

Posted
Posted

Another man i peril joke.

A man was swimming at the beach.he got caught in a rip and he started to wave for some help from the lifegaurd.The lifegaurd saw this and he he began to make his way to the man.

But before he coud get to the water a SHARK came and bit his legs off.With the lifegaurd almost there and the man waving desparatly for help the shark made another turn arround and bit his arms off.

By the time the lifegaurd got to the man the shark had allready made it's way away from the man.So the lifegaurd says hop on,and by the time the lifegaurd got to shore he yelled out ''god damn i feel fu%^ed''.And the man said ''sorry it was the only way i could hold on''.

It's a lame'o old skool joke,i know.I heard back in the day.And it's a bit far fetched for realism i know,but when i saw your beach joke and the man with no arms and legs it reminded me of this one.

EDIT:He only has 1 set of arms and legs. :bscreen:

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Trust33 Grand Master

Trust33

Posted
Posted

Another.but sadly from the net.Not an origional but enjoy.

A Husband and Wife are outside one day. the Husband is cooking on the BBQ and the Wife is bent over working in the flower garden. The Husband says to his wife, “honey your ass is almost as wide as this grill”. The Wife ignores him. A little while latter, the Husband gets out his measuring tape, measures the grill, measures the Wifes ass, and says, “Yup just as wide as the grill”. The Wife ignores him again. Latter that night the husband is fooling around in bed, and the Wife is ignoring him. So the Husband says, “com’on honey!”. The Wife rolls over and says, “you must be crazy if you think I’m gonna fire up the grill for a little weiner like that”.

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BiZzReVhEad Community Regular

BiZzReVhEad

Posted
Posted

A man was throwing Petrol over a Crowd of Muslims ,

a police officer saw the man and asked him what he

Thought he was doing, The man replyed, about 15 to

the gallon

A recent survey was conducted to why men like blowjobs,

10% said they like the feeling,

25% said they like the closeness of eachother

65% said they liked the Fu#@ing silence

:D :D

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