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A girl says to her doctor, "You have to help me. I hurt all over."

She touches her right knee with her index finger and says, "Ow! That hurts."

She touches her left cheek with her index finger and says, "Ouch! That hurts, too."

She touches her right earlobe with her index finger and says, "Ow! Even that hurts."

The doctor says, "Are you a natural blonde?"

She says, "Yes."

The doctor says, "You have a sprained finger."

There are three blondes stranded on an island. Suddenly a fairy appears and offers to grant each one of them one wish.

The first blonde asks to be intelligent. Instantly, she is turned into a brown haired woman and she swims off the island.

The next one asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one, so instantly she is turned into a black haired woman. The black haired woman builds a boat and sails off the island.

The third blonde asks to become even more intelligent than the previous two. The fairy turns her into a man, and he walks across the bridge.

One day while on patrol, a police officer pulled over a car for speeding. He went up to the car and asked the driver to roll down her window. The first thing he noticed, besides the nice red sports car, was how gorgeous the driver was! Drop dead blonde, the works.

"I've pulled you over for speeding, Ma'am.... Could I see your driver's license...?"

"...License...???" replied the blonde, instantly revealing that she wasn't very bright.

"It's usually in your wallet..." replied the officer.

After fumbling for a few minutes, the driver managed to find it.

"Now may I see your registration..." asked the cop.

"Registration..... what's that....?" asked the blonde.

"It's usually in your glove compartment..." said the cop impatiently.

After more fumbling, she found the registration.

"I'll be back in a minute," said the cop and walked back to his car. The officer radioed the dispatch to run a check on the woman's license and registration. After a few moments, the dispatcher came back.

"Ummm.... is this woman driving a red sports car?"

"Yes," replied the officer.

"Is she a drop dead gorgeous blonde?" asked the dispatcher.

"Uh... yes" replied the cop.

"Here's what you do...." said the dispatcher. "Give her the stuff, stand back, and drop your pants..."

"WHAT!!? I can't do that. That's crazy!" exclaimed the cop.

"Trust me..... just do it...." said the dispatcher.

So the cop returned to the blonde, gave back the license and registration, and dropped his pants as the dispatcher said.

The blonde looked down and sighed, "Ohh no... not ANOTHER breathalyzer....

*sings* in the ghe-ttoooooo

lol yeah, basically. just with bogans everywhere.

bogan: "umm yeeeeehhhh, i wonna kno if can *trails of into unknown bogan language*"

mike: "huh?"

bogan: "yeah"

mike: "you want what?"

bogan: "car"

mike: "you want a car?"

bogan: "nah nah, my car"

mike: "your not making sense *curses under his breath*"

bogan: "nah, joomp car"

mike: "jump start?"

bogan: "yeah yeah!"

mike: "no jumper leads sorry."

bogan: "why not?"

*AAAARGH FARKIN IDIOTS!!!!!!*

yeah, thats my job :cool: and whoring on here of course

Edited by lilmike86
lol yeah, basically. just with bogans everywhere.

bogan: "umm yeeeeehhhh, i wonna kno if can *trails of into unknown bogan language*"

mike: "huh?"

bogan: "yeah"

mike: "you want what?"

bogan: "car"

mike: "you want a car?"

bogan: "nah nah, my car"

mike: "your not making sense *curses under his breath*"

bogan: "nah, joomp car"

mike: "jump start?"

bogan: "yeah yeah!"

mike: "no jumper leads sorry."

bogan: "why not?"

*AAAARGH FARKIN IDIOTS!!!!!!*

yeah, thats my job :cool: and whoring on here of course

so you work at a automotive store?

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