I'm in exactly the same situation - same turbo etc etc.. I havent run a BOV forever and i've got almost zero shaft play too.
I'm in the same boat. I dont care what anyone says, my car has got less response and more lag with the recirc stock BOV (compared to running NO BOV). I've tested extensively, and there is a very noticeable difference. I was worried though about the life of my turbo obviously, and so I decided to check the amount of shaft play after nearly 25,000km of running with no BOV. Almost none.
The theory that you guys have been talking about is utterly logical, and I dont think that there is any disputing that a recirculating BOV SHOULD mean less damage for your turbo, and better response. I think that the reality may be either different to what the theory suggests, or in fact that the effect of running no BOV arent quite as severe as suggested. I'm basing this on the fact that I have tested it, and this is the experience that I've had.