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Peggy: What if he is cheating on me?

Marcy: Stand by your man - in court! Take him for everything and get yourself another man. A real man.

Peggy: I don't want a real man. I want Al!

Marcy: Why?

Peggy: Oh I don't know . Have you ever had a pair of old shoes? They're boring and ugly and stink to high heaven. But they're yours, you know? They're worn down and broken in and... and when you put 'em on it feels like there's nothing there, hahaha. That's my Al.

"We don't eat vegetables."

"When one of us is embarrassed, the rest of us feel better about ourselves."

"A Bundy never wins, but a Bundy never quits."

"A Bundy never eats."

"A Bundy never learns."

"A Bundy never cares."

"A Bundy never dies."

"We don't call the cops. They call the cops on us!"

"Lie if your wife is awaking. Lie if your belly is aching. Lie if you think she's faking. Lie, sell shoes, lie."

"Hooters, hooters, yum, yum, yum. Hooters, hooters on a girl that's dumb."

*****!!! it's what keeps us from being happy. There's no point in fighting. It's what seperates us from the ordinary losers. They can have their moments, but not us. Never us. (xxx) Your mother is just a XXX by marriage. She's part of the curse. But we are blood whores. We are truly doomed."

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