Help required to navigate Melbourne

[Mr. Oizo]

I DO like the occasional non descript stuff so thats what im tryin to find.. cluey t-shirts, nice dress tops, maybe some jeans whatever .. shieeet that when i come back to sydney some random hottie will come up to me and be like "hi nice clothes can i suck you off?" then ill be like "yeaa thats the true beauty you're seeing and its the best way to get to know me".. then ill punch bob in the eye and jump out the window with my cape.

WOOO best adventure EVARRRR.

Ahahaha, you have a VERY vivid imagination...

krzysiu - As for the hook turn i think meggala will have to demonstrate first - I've heard about it.. seen it.. i still dont get it.

Reminds me of an episode of Pizza where the boys take a trip to Melbourne, and run into Nick Gianopolis as a Taxi Driver,

[martydaman]

lol... if you want to turn right, then you need to turn left first... thats the fun of hook turns... welcome to melbourne

[adznight]

ROFL! Hook turns! They crack me up, had a friend from SA here, she thought I was trying to kill us!

It's really pretty simple when u see it. On green you enter the intersection and in the left lane and wait in front of the stopped traffic untill your lights go amber, you then look to see that traffic flow has stopped and turn right like the pic shows once the stopped traffic has a green. Good luck!

[adznight]

Just be on the look out for these signs

[someonestolecc]

Reminds me of an episode of Pizza where the boys take a trip to Melbourne, and run into Nick Gianopolis as a Taxi Driver,

HAH thats EXACTLY what I thought of too.. "dont you know bloody hook turn you sydney poofta bloody!" haha made me cack so hard.

Thanks greatly for the diagram+picture adz.. that's priceless mate I appreciate that very much.

So.. lemme get this straight.. your stopped at the lights (diagram guy 1) light goes green.. you hook it left.. stop (diagram guy 2).. then another light somewhere goes amber (I assume from red) and you continue your turn (diagram guy 3) ?

[inark]

LMAO nice pics and illustrations... yeah i shit myself when i first came to melbourne... i was like.. "OMG what the **** are u doing!!!"

then i was like... "thats retarded"

[inark]

ust as long as when u finally turn u sound ur horn and u have an avocado displayed on ur rear window u will be just fine

[adznight]

So.. lemme get this straight.. your stopped at the lights (diagram guy 1) light goes green.. you hook it left.. stop (diagram guy 2).. then another light somewhere goes amber (I assume from red) and you continue your turn (diagram guy 3) ?

Yup pretty much spot on. The light you'll see go amber is the one in front of you and it go's amber from green just like normall. You just have to sit there in front off the stopped cars and watch the lights in front of you, once you see it go amber you can look behind and in front of you, if the traffic has stopped then you sweet to go.

Just one word of warning though, don't just assume they have stopped when it go's amber, more than likely some d|ckhead will put the foot down through the amber light and T-bone you so be carefull but in the end I bet you'll find it's eaaasy.

[someonestolecc]

hehe nark.

[someonestolecc]

You just have to sit there in front off the stopped cars and watch the lights in front of you, once you see it go amber you can look behind and in front of you, if the traffic has stopped then you sweet to go.

I'm confused now.

Is the purpose of the hook turn to get you behind the people who cued across the intersection?

I think ill watch first.. sounds stoopider the more I think about it. O_o

[inark]

no its too confuse people from other states/countries into killing them selves

[someonestolecc]

heh victorian traffic death trap... sweeeeeeet .

[predator]

ha.. you got sucked in by the "other airport black hole for tourists" - just because its in Victoria doesn't mean its anywhere near the city or civilization as we know it. Its like boganville except a bit worse..

no its too confuse people from other states/countries into killing them selves

its so funny because its true.. haha

You are better off walking too, as you'll get a speeding fine soon as you even get into a car - its a new "Get in your car Tax" Bracks is introducing, in conjunction with the "new -20km/hr speeding tollerance" for any given speed sign.. Its great stuff - but can be tricky to work out

[inark]

lol gordo

[chubbs]

As far as I know, the hook turn is there so you don't stop tram traffic that is travelling the same way as you.

Behold my MS Paint skillz:

See, if you turn like you normally would, you stop tram traffic from continuing on through the intersection, thus ****ing things up quite considerably. They sit there going "ding ding ding ding ding ding" .... etc until you move the **** out of the way.

[adznight]

Now thats class I just couldn't be bothered!

[Duncan]

GET OUT BEFORE ITS TOO LATE!

The only place worth going is Phillip Island. Those peguins are damn cute

[someonestolecc]

Predator - LOL. i'll feel right at home sounds like sydney.

Just outta interest why do you say I'm goin to the bogan airport? I thought the qantas/jetstar one is the bogan one and the virgin one is the good one?

Oh dear.

[edit: well you got me scared so i checked which airport I am at - Melbourne International Airport, Virgin Blue Terminal, Airport Drive, Melbourne VIC 3045, Australia]

Thanks Chubb ROFL love your eleet skills.. it actually makes sense its what i was thinking but forgot about the trams.

[inark]

haha CC.

yeah mate ur going to the main airport... its only about 15mins from the city.

[someonestolecc]

Sweet!