Public Health Warning!

[inark]

Yes thats right... the next time you are down the shops and decide to buy a big bag of Allens Party Mix think twice. These things need a warning label on them.

On the weekend i thought i would indulge in some of my favourites like Coke Bottles, Teeth and Rasberries. If only i had known.

The first few went down a treat... sweet and sugary, just what you need when you wake up.

However, while holding my son i thought i would throw a few in at once and go down to the lounge floor where all his toys are spread out and engage in some ever entertaining block building with him.

While on the ground he came over and jumped on my guts as i was inhaling and as i knew what he was about to do i sucked in my gut and tensed my stomach (hes now over 14kgs and 80cm which for an 11 month old is quite large) which resulted in me inhaling large chunks of said lollies down the wrong pipe.

Of course he found this extreeeemely amusing and did it again for good measure and continued to piss himself laughing til he eventually fell off me.

By this time i had managed to finally clear my aorta of all foreign objects and continued on with our fun and games.

After about 5 minutes i started getting that feeling like when your getting a really bad cold or flu and the back of your nasal passage starts burning. 3 hours later the family decided we would go to the shops and whilst in the car the pain started getting really bad, more so then any other cold or flu I've had. So, as you do, i snorted back as hard as i could and sucked into my mouth one very large peice of Coke Bottle... mmmmmmmm sweetest grot ive ever sucked back.

So there it was... the cause of all that pain for 3 hours was a sweet and so called harmless 10c treat hell bent on destruction burning away at my nasal lining.

We shouldnt be sending troops to Iraq to look for WMD's, its the Allens lolly factory we need to be searching! So make sure not to partake in any physical activity while eating these melevalent little weapons of mass destruction.

Youve been warned!

(just thought id share... see i still contribute to these forums )

[ClutchBurndout-:(]

ouch, its scary as hell when that happens, but i dont think the problem is with the coke bottles, i think its because you ate them with your lungs...

[inark]

haha this is true... not the ideal way to eat something

[~R33AzzA~]

LoL, what a great read to start the day with a laugh..

[Jetdat]

thanks narkeh now i am craving coke bottles at work!!

[madbung]

Funny story,very entertaining...

Just to allay any fear or confusion for other readers, the aorta is a part of the vascular system (artery) and not a part of the respiratory system.

Glad you survived to give your cheeky boy a clip over the ear

[inark]

lol

yeah i mean the other one... the oesophagus

[HEKT1K]

lol

yeah i mean the other one... the oesophagus

lol mate wrong again, the oesophagus is where food SHOULD go.. sounds like the coke bottle was lodged in your trachea (or 'wind pipe')

anyway im gald you made it out alive!

[inark]

HAHAH yeah thats the one!

[~R33AzzA~]

LoL @ the terminology confusion..

I am also craving coke bottles haha.

[RBPOWA-(TJ)]

iv'd had the crap happen to me, burning i know food has some how worked it way up to the back of my nazel passage. but then there is the other weird thing happens , i try to had to hawk it out or snort it back that i then start to hic-up ... then it just starts to be frustraighting and anoying.... Just my 2 cents

you story is a good read for a laugh !

[dezz]

How dare you speak ill of Allens Retro Party Mix.

Coke bottles, red lips and pineapples are the shit!

teeth suck ass though

[llama_au]

lips suck ass though

That doesn't sound pleasant

[Basti]

dont knock it till you've tried it J.........jks

man i've had that happen to me before. plus im a curry so you do the math. allens lollies would be vastly preferrable

[Do-Luck]

No fair.

All the greenies I snort back are always bitter.

I must try this.

[trel]

lol f**k me dead! this guy nearly died and were laughing.... lol no shit that was pretty damn funny though... hehe

[funkymonkey]

I think the moral of this story is that you shouldn't be allowed to reproduce narkeh.

bonus points for nark-jnr for kicking you in the guts so early on in the game.

[inark]

LoL @ the terminology confusion..

I am also craving coke bottles haha.

lol well its better then gender confusion like my little dwarfen sri lankan monkey friend... shan

this is why im not a doctor... id be like Dr. Nick from the Simpsons... /removes heart... "there, no more stomach pains for you"

[Spiral]

We could all be typing R.I.P. posts if that was a killer python instead of a coke bottle

[~R33AzzA~]

We could all be typing R.I.P. posts if that was a killer python instead of a coke bottle

HAHAHA