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OMFG! *orgasm*

EXCLUSIVE!!!

In a stunning development, this weekend Formula One will see Michael Schumacher return to the cockpit of a Ferrari F1 car and race again!

Sources inside the legendary Prancing Horse squad have confirmed exclusively to PaddockTalk.com that later today – April 1st – the legendary Michael Schumacher will be announced as a temporary replacement for the embattled Brazilian Felipe Massa.

Though not for the reason that most would expect… and many won’t believe it.

While running second on lap 31 in the Malaysian Grand Prix, it was clear that Massa clipped the curb at the exit of Turn 6 and his F2008 hit quite hard. Though the impact with the curb didn’t damage the car seriously, what was kept a secret is that Massa’s wrist was wrenched by the sudden spin and that he has been unable to safely hold the steering wheel of a road car, much less a top-of-the-line Ferrari Formula One challenger with 4-5 gs loaded into it.

Though some will be doubtful of Massa’s un-fitness, because of the firestorm of disapproval from the F1 senior home, and the Italian media who reigned down criticism on him for making three major mistakes in the two season opening races – the first two events without traction control – it is a fact, that Felipe Massa is injured and will be unable to race at Bahrain.

Which may be a worse situation for the youngster.

There are a number of similarities between this year and last year for the Brazilian. Last year, he had a difficult run over the first couple of races and was in the media spotlight, facing criticism to which he reacted in the best possible way, by taking a convincing victory in the desert.

But this year, he will not get that same chance because of his wrist injury.

Though he’s rested after a quick trip home to Brazil, and is said to have put behind him the frustrations of the first two races.

He’ll be watching the Bahrain Grand Prix from a stool in the Ferrari garage.

We reached Schumacher in transit to the Gulf for a comment on the upcoming Bahrain Grand Prix. Though surprised by our knowledge of the situation he said, “Yes… It is true… but it is temporary. It is not a comeback at this time. I am scheduled for Bahrain, and if the team need me for additional events I will consider them at that time.”

Meanwhile, inquiring minds were extremely curious why Ferrari tester Marc Gene – who has been evaluating aerodynamic elements at Vairano – won’t be in the car.

Apparently new Ferrari boss Stefano Domenicali went to the mat with President Luca di Montezemolo in favor of the retired legend who had to be coaxed out of his comfortable retirement of riding two-wheelers, and watching whales.

Though Montezemolo didn’t initially approve of the move, Domenicali was able to persevere by pointing to Schumacher’s exceptionally strong pace during his winter testing excursions, and the current 13 point gap to the McLaren team. He reportedly told his boss, “We must score the maximum 18 points, and put our chief adversaries back on their heels while we can. We must not get as far behind as we did last season. Michael Schumacher is the best man to put in the car. He has won in Bahrain, and he can win it again!”

Though if Schumacher is to win again, he will have his challenges because he will probably run with the same engine Massa used and crashed in the searing Malaysian heat. But since Massa didn’t finish the race, Ferrari could decide to change the lump come Saturday.

Ferrari have won twice in the desert in four runnings. They won the inaugural Bahrain Grand Prix in 2004 with Michael Schumacher at the wheel , and Barrichello close behind. In 2007, they won again though it was a much closer battle as Felipe Massa beat rookie Lewis Hamilton by just two seconds, while Raikkonen picked up third place points.

There is an extended three-week vacation following Bahrain before the Spanish Grand Prix, and Massa is expected to be 100 percent fit once the Formula One circus reaches the Barcelona circuit.

But if Michael Schumacher’s race-craft at Bahrain looks anything like the seven-time F1 World champion that amazed the world… It’s going to be extremely hard for the powers that be to justify putting Massa back in the car…

Though they will be harder pressed to keep Michael in it.

Edited by Marco-R34GTT

I posted the video 2 days ago. It has been forced out of the papers website.

I have no idea where to get it now but the way this stuff reproduces these days theres no doubt someones got a link to it somewhere.

Once in cyberspace, always in cyberspace.

I saw it!

This wanker isnt going to resign...

What do we have to do to get rid of this animal?

http://www.planetf1.com/story/0,18954,3213_3374062,00.html

Edited by m3gtr

dude, get a grip! hes the most powerful man in motorsport, busted whipping chicks and getting flogged stupid himself all the while while reenacting a nazi war camp scene.

How can ANYONE in their right minds, let a man like that govern anything??

"In fact, we at Ferrari have the best driver pairing in the world. I expect a great race from Felipe in Bahrain, after his wonderful qualifying session in Malaysia."

....

http://planetf1.com/story/0,18954,3213_3372397,00.html

You know posting April fools jokes the day after April fools day makes you an idiot...

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