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Bottom line of if all: it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks is fair or reasonable, if Leigh is uncomfortable with the situation and he is, it's his house and with no lease in place he can effectively do what he wants to rectify the situation. Money will make him feel more comfortable so he can rightly ask for that.

As for mates and holding grudges, well Leigh's room mate changed the agreement here. He never said anything about a girlfriend living there when they made the agreement and anyone who thinks the increase in cost of living is so marginal it doesn't matter probably hasn't lived in a share house before - it makes a difference. Regardless of cost of living, just having another person in the house with their stuff etc. reduces living space, interferes with television watching etc., ability for Leigh to invite people over before it gets crowded, dirt in house etc. It's a person in the house that Leigh doesn't necessarily trust just because his mate does. She could steal shit for all he knows. There are heaps of variables it changes having another person.

Also, see how kind Greg is with a 10 strong Filipino family running around the house and how much patience you have after a couple months! There's a reason hotels have guest limits.

You can't - It isn't nice.

That's not to say it isn't fair, cause it's entirely fair. It is your place.

But when they're paying rent, they aren't in an hotel room, when people pay rent they expect that they're living there, which means, well it is their home.

People gonna treat it that way, and, well, anyone who rents from you is also going to feel they have the right to do that.

The money you receive from renter is compensation for having to wait to use water etc, people getting in the way of the fridge, etc.

It is. Inside that room they can do whatever - it's what they are paying for. It's their home now. It's an important distinction to make.. it is their private area, and their rent covers being able to comfortably use and live in shared areas.

This also means they have the right and the expectation to be 100% comfortable that shared areas are also their home.... as much as Leigh does, not any less than that.

She should have to contribute, but she may be effectively sub-letting from your mate, not necessarily resulting in you receiving double rent.

You'd have to assess impact and actually provide some kind of numbers to them that are based in reality if you don't want them to get angry and both move out. I don't know how close you are to this friend but it can result in permanently killing friendships over things like this.

If you increase your mate's rent by 20% (or whatever amount you choose), you're going to need to be able to explain why its costing you more for them to accept it..

You've got to make them understand where you're coming from or you will get pushback (which you already have as they instantly said "Oh yeah mate make an exception on the first week aye?". If they don't understand it they will think you're being a flamin mongrel, whether you have a solid case or not :P

Lol.

They aren't both renting a place, it's Leigh's joint and his mate rents a room. His house his rules end of story. Nothing else is a factor, if old mate doesn't like it, he has the right to f**k off. Period.

Classic case of flatmates turning mates against each other

Also classic case of all rules not being discussed before moving in

Also classic case of you needing to tell him bad luck you had an agreement and his relationship problems and his gf's family problems aren't your problem

Classic case of failed change management

Classic case of testing the boundaries to see consequences

The result of a solution is valued by the quality of the change and its acceptance.

Working out a fair $ amount is only half the solution if they don't agree with the problem it is resolving. .

No one here will be able to tell you the solution as we don't understand the drivers behind their actions.

Approach them both in a consultative manner and express your problem and not your solution. We are quick to jump to solutions without understanding the root cause of the problem.

A well defined problem is a problem half solved.

Perhaps your solution is not about the $figure but the visibility of ownership/value within the gf. Especially since it's your house and your accomplishment milestone.

Your comments about her making good coin sounds to me like the issue is around having equal values surrounding ownership/respect rather than covering the extra cost of water.

Sit them down & explain your problem, not your solution. Make it their problem to solve not yours.

/thisiswhatidoforaliving

Lol.

They aren't both renting a place, it's Leigh's joint and his mate rents a room. His house his rules end of story. Nothing else is a factor, if old mate doesn't like it, he has the right to f**k off. Period.

Everyone will value their own view the strongest. Just because Leigh holds the power doesn't mean his solution is the best for the situation.

A person who waves his power-card to resolve an issue may be seen as unfair in the eyes of others.

Yes it will get a resolution but what implications will it cause down the road; a ruined friendship, a bad reputation etc

Sometimes having the power makes it even more difficult as your emotions can enable a rash action.

As I said, it's not your problem to solve. It the three of you. Understand the problem & if you all come to a disagreement at least you will all know what the final outcome is without you resorting to threatening it.

Wait just a minute mister process engineer

I'd like to introduce you to a friend of mine called an IPO chart

I = Leigh gets balls

P = Leigh tells room mate to put up or shut up

O = Leigh is happy

  • Like 1

Wait just a minute mister process engineer

I'd like to introduce you to a friend of mine called an IPO chart

I = Leigh gets balls

P = Leigh tells room mate to put up or shut up

O = Leigh is happy

It's actually SIPOC but I'll let that slide as it wouldn't add anymore value.

Unless we want to elaborate on which supplier can provide Leigh some balls & which customer wants a happy Leigh

Also, see how kind Greg is with a 10 strong Filipino family running around the house and how much patience you have after a couple months! There's a reason hotels have guest limits.

I live in a share house with 3 other people, so 4 people total. Last night there were 10 adults in the house. This is quite common most nights of the week.

It's never been a problem for me.

But everyone is different.

Rekin is on the money on how to handle situations. Do like me some good change management. It's all about getting them to understand Leigh's mindset on the whole thing. They will then come around if its done right, because its likely that the tenants aren't horrible people and are unaware how Leigh is perceiving them.

Dezz's solution will work, but gotta remember Leigh is asking for assistance because he feels being a brutal dictator isn't how he wants to approach the situation, or he would have already done it ;)

  • Like 1

Is the 3 person share house a 2 bedroom unit?

I disagree, I think he wants courage and backing from VWL to help him be brutal.

It's a 4 person shared house, with 4 people living there, Everyone with friends/partners/cars parked outside.

Bonus points, between the 4 of us, we own 7 cars. Then add the cars of all the other partners and friends, yeah, it's fair to say there's people around...

3 people in a 2 bedroom unit can be annoying, sure, feel clustered, yep. But.. 10 people in a 4 bedroom house is arguably more than that!

However, it works in my case. Depends a lot on everyone involved and everyone else's experiences can't be directly compared...

It's a 4 person shared house, with 4 people living there, Everyone with friends/partners/cars parked outside.

Bonus points, between the 4 of us, we own 7 cars. Then add the cars of all the other partners and friends, yeah, it's fair to say there's people around...

3 people in a 2 bedroom unit can be annoying, sure, feel clustered, yep. But.. 10 people in a 4 bedroom house is arguably more than that!

However, it works in my case. Depends a lot on everyone involved and everyone else's experiences can't be directly compared...

i know people who live like that... unless big farking house and big farking backyard + soundproofing inside, i couldnt do it.

my first experience meeting a household of people (NZ'rs strangely enough) living in a converted shop space back of Fitzroy. was like 4 bedrooms (6-10 people staying most night i assume), joint kitchen/bathroom and living space. There were walls between the rooms but the roof was about 5 foot above where the walls finished. so you could hear EVERYTHING that went on. would drive me frigging nuts. i guess they were all marijuana fiends so probably slept like logs.

features included:

- alley way entrance

- amateur tattoo gun located in someones room

- a lock of hair strangely dangling from the roof above the door (apparently was there when they moved in)

- large communal fish tank

but i guess i might have gotten used to it or fit in if I worked full-time at a cafe and was a medium level drug dealer to get by. but i guess ill never know

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